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Monday, July 29, 2013

Monday's Must Nots

This week has a bit of a theme.....I bet you can guess it :)

1. Do not confuse fun with love

He makes you smile and laugh. You have a good time one-on-one and with your friends. You can be goofy, silly, ridiculous and feel oh-so comfortable. This feeling is called happiness.  You are having something called "fun". Now, as much as this may seem like a bit of a foreign concept to you, this in and of itself does not mean that you have found love.  Remember that. 

2. Do not confuse respect with love

He holds your hand not your ass. She enjoys your thoughts as much as your kisses.  You've agreed to maintain certain boundaries and neither of you have tested the line.  He keeps his word. She speaks with respect. You can disagree without needing to call in a referee.  These are respectful interactions. These in and of themselves do not mean that you have found love.  Remember this, too.

3. Do not confuse sex with love

Something about kisses, endorphins and oxytocin that can make you forget that sex -- even good sex -- in and of itself does not mean that you have found love.  Remember this before, during and especially after. For reals.

4. Do not confuse the word love with the action of love

Ever heard the phrase "actions speak louder than words?" Well, take that to the bank on this one.  "I love you" coupled with disrespect is not the act of loving. "I love you" followed by abusive language or behaviour is not the act of loving. "I love you" without concious regard for your needs and wants is not the act of loving. "I love you" on its own sounds good, feels empty and is not enough.  Remember this.

5. Do not substitute anything for what you actually want

He or she may be fun, respectful and kiss like the french...may even toss the L-word out there every once in a while, but if it doesn't feel right, it isn't.  Don't stop having fun, expect to be respected and well, do what you want with our own body, but please remember never to substitute these things for what it is that you ultimately want.

Gotta remember these.....



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